Dispatches from The Mayan Empire

"…The shocking thing about any stripper gathering, I discovered, was that you have never heard women talk so fast and so explicitly about money in all your life. They make the guys on the trading floor on Wall Street look like a bunch of pansies." - Susie Bright, Big Sex Little Death: A Memoir + + + It took me approximately four days to end up in a Mexican strip club. Keep in mind this was not at all my intention, I mean it, stop laughing. I had gone out to a local restaurant/bakery called Renee's for some of their divine pastries in anticipation of an evening figuring out how to get my car, laden with tons of shit as it is, from here to Rio Bravo and a proper bank branch. [[I confess that any poor choices made may... may have had something to do with this. The tequila, not the cat food.]] [[Seems legit.]] After leaving the bakery, with my nice leather satchel full of pastries, a gentleman accosted me offering me a free beer and a free lap da...